Through the Walls

I see it as a test of faith can this men who is nothing to the world be my something. Will my faith in the Lord deliever a blessing after my long lonly walk? Yes my faith in him is strong. I've discover strength I never even knew I had. Strength to stick with him. Courage to go forth even when many believe I should turn away. My faith push be forward to visit, to write, to love, and to trust in him and in the Lord. My life is weird from a outside perspective, how come I am settling for a "Inmate" but from the inside I am filled with so much I really can't explain it. One day I am in love and 3 years isn't much then a another day I may be anger cause I have to wait I want him now. Through letters and prayers I've been getting by. I want to leave you with this "Bless is she who believed for there will be a fulfillment of those things which were told her from the lord" luke 1:45

I'm in a relationship with an inmate, its so hard not having him here. I'm a very physical person, I need his touch and to be able to just hold him. I feel like half of me is missing with him gone. Its been so many years since he went to prison, and still a few years left to go. I struggle everyday with not having a little "hold me over" sex on the side. I don't know how these women do this, or maybe they just aren't telling the truth about what they do. But seriously, how do you go years without ever doing anything? I don't get that. I have tried time and time again to stop, to just say no and not do it, but it seems like no matter how hard I try to do without the physical part I just never get far. I only see my man in prison like once a year due to the cost of traveling to visit, etc. Its hard not being able to visit him or see him. I miss him so much I just want him home with me and our son. People don't know how hard it is to stand by somebody you love so much when the rest of the world hates him and tells you how wrong you are for loving him. My theory is, every person in this world deserves to be loved, even inmates. How then can we teach our children about love if we ourselves show hate towards those that need love the most. I miss my man in prison. :( Just sharing my sad moment.

My Friend just got out of prison and is in a halfway house. He is a good man and I am very blessed to have him in my life. I met him from a pen pal website during the last months of his sentence. We met for the first time face to face 2 weeks ago. Anyone who did not know would have no idea we were meeting for the first time.
We talk everyday and look forward to my next visit. He will be on home confinement starting June 17. I am worried about him going back to the same behaviors. We talk about him moving here with me in another state but I do not know if I am ready for that type of a commitment so soon.
I see the future as an open door for us but I have never dealt with anyone who is so fresh off of time.
Maybe someone reading this who understands can be a support for me.
Thank You Pedro for this blog.

hello, well where do i start? I've been married to a man for a little over 10 years, who is in a federal prison. We were married only 6 months before he went to prison. So basically my whole married life has been thru the prison system. Honestly love is such a powerful emotion that it has eased just about every obstacle that we've endured, the non-sex part, the loneliness, the family resentment. just like couples on the street together we have arguments and disagreements, but again what couple doesn't. last year though, i went to see my husband ( i drove 4 hours up and 4 hours back), anyway i was devastated to see another womans name on his visitor register, idt crushed me like no other pain i've ever endured, how could a man in prison with a life sentence cheat on me? well we are still in communication, and he fills we are still married,but all my trust is gone, yet i still love him and care for him like a true friend should. i'll always be concerned and in communication with him, but our talks and visits are not the same, there is no way i can be insecure about an inmate!! but its something you must go thru yourself to really have an opinion or comment.

I met my husband while he was incarcerated. He had been sentenced to a life bid. We got married 6 months after I met him. he got paroled to the streets 7 years later and I can say happily that he has not returned to prison. he made a mistake at age 18 and is still on parole, which can be a revolving door for some. However, we have two wonderful children, have been married now for 20 years this june, 2011, and I can honestly say that doing the 7 years with him was hard, very hard, but it all was worth it in the end. Stick by your man.

I sometimes I ask myself, "why him", what keeps me standing. Him and I have a history since high school. He was my first for everything. When he went to prison the first time, I tried to stick by his side but of course I was young, and didn't see why I should put my life on hold because he committed a crime, and I walked away from the relationship. I asked God on that same day, if he comes back to me, it's meant to be. I loved him very much. 14 years later and his second time in, he found me. I was married and not happy at all in my current marriage. All the kept love came rushing back so amazingly fast. I had not realized how much I loved that man, and no other man not even my husband has ever made me feel the way he has. My heart smiles each and every contact we have either by visit or phone or by letter. He is my soulmate, and the walls between us now can't last forever. I'm willing to wait on him, to wait for this love. He's an inmate but a beautiful and warm soul. I left my husband for my inmate. You only have one heart and you have to follow it. My inmate will be home in 6mths, and I'm very excited to begin our life together and help him transition back into the free world. Is it easy loving and inmate, NO, but if you put your all into making it what you want it to be it's well worth it.

Loving an inmate is a test of charecter and faith. I have known my fiancee since we were young I had loved him for years and never told him. I was married to an abusive husband and then my father took his own life! It was hell but he stood by me he helped me through the darkest hours of my life and when I finally admitted my love for him. He said why didn't you tell me? Now we have been together for 3 years I plan on marrying him in 2014 after I finish school I love him with all my heart and soul I cant imagine life without him in it!! I wouldn't give him up ever! Somedays it is hard because I miss him so much it hurts but in the end I know life will be beautiful he truely is a good man!

ifall in love with an inmate, although ware in adifferent country i do love him so much. ilost alot of tears it is very painful, even iwill like to visit him it cannot be because it is very hard to enter in his country.

love is really mystery ,we are two people who are in love to each other but this love

ifall in love with an inmate whom ithought is possible for us to be together. ilive in a third world country and it is possible to enter in their country. i love this guy so much evrytime i thouhgt of our situation ifeel so helpless.

ilove a man who is currntly serving 1 years and 8 months i am willing tqo wait until he will release ,

it takes only20 months before my love will release from jail i can;t wait for that day to come i love this guy so much.

being in love with an inmate is not easy especially when you live in adifferent country ihave fallin love with an inmate who is currently serving3 years in jail we startedout as friends untilwe fall in love to each other. i really love this man but the distance is always an obstacle, but then i can wait for him because he has only 15 months left before he will release. and i can't wait for that day to come.

i been sending a lot of letter to ken lately this is how i love him by sending a lot of mail . i love him so much.

i miss ken so much , he is my everything, because i love him iam willing to wait until he was released.ihope things will be like it when he will released.some change when they are released.

today is december31 2011 and in a few hours it will be the changing of the year, and in a months my love will release i waited for years with this relationship , if you love someone you can sacrifice alot of things,i was in love with a man whom i dont even know if we will be together. we live in another country and possible for us to be together but then i can wait if we are really meant to each other .

I have 2 son in prison ilove them with all my heart its very hard everyday god and family gets me through it met a inmate from one son its been a year now and i love him dearly,but he is married and i feel bad we fell in love. but i pray for him all the time .we talk five times or more a day i guess the all need love no matter where it comes from

today is jan,18 2012time will flies easily and ken will release in jail in 18 months i can;t wait for the day he will release he is my evrything and my life .

ken write me a letter telling me to call it quits it hurts me so much reading those words.i love him so much .and waited for years for his release suddely he change his mind
pls. someday when you release i want you to read this, so u know that i love you and that you remain here in my heart.

i spent days crying because i dont received letter from ken anymore, its very painful on my part because i love him so much . i hope one day he will write me again .

i miss ken so much, i hope when he will release from jail he will read all of this. ken you will always be a part of me.

04/2013- I have been talking to this guy named Roger for 5 years. He got my name tattooed on his ring finger and I got his name tattooed on my chest. I came VERY close to marrying him but I didn't. Are talking has been on and off because of trust issues I have. We met while he was in prison because he had a cellphone and a friend of mine had a cousin who was locked up with him. Iv'e met almost all of his family, and I used to go visit him all of the time but it has been awhile because of money and transportation. I love this guy so much, but I have the hardest time trusting what he says because he's in prison. My brother (who has been to prison twice) found out that I was talking to him and he warned me that guys in prison "jail talk" girls all the time and then there's guys that mean what they say at the time but then when they get out their mind changes and then you've wasted your life on some guy that ended up hurting you and cheating on you and using you. I love him though. I think about everything realistically, and i'm honestly not caught up in some fantasy or something. I really do want to be with him and have a family when he is released. He says he wants that to but he got sentenced to 15 years and I don't know a single man that would go without sex for that long and then only want one pussy forever. I feel like im screwed either way. One of the times we stopped talking, I got pregnant. I had stayed faithful to him for so long and I had planned to go see him and had the money and everything and then he got in trouble for possession of pills and it pissed me off that im sitting here loving him and he's fucking up making it where I cant even see him and ruining his chances of getting any gain time so I said fuck it and decided to get it in (which was stupid) but i was 18 years old. And i feel like if he's in prison and he's getting in trouble then it's common sense that when he gets out hes going to keep fucking up. But then I think, "if i dont try then ill never know" and he really is worth waiting for. No other guy has gave me the feeling I get when I see him. IDK just venting. hmmm.

Is this blog active? Could pedro pls email me! Thanx
sametribeuniversally@yahoo.com
Mwaah

June 5, 2013

Don't know if anyone even reads this blog but I have a secret that no one understands. I have reunited with a boy from my past. I met him when he was 17 and I was 15. He was a bad boy from the start...he was a juvenile delinquent living in a place called a satalite house...which is a trial run to see if they can adapt to family home situation.

so then when he got out we stayed in touch until I was 19.

when I was 26 and he was 28 we found each other again and spent time together...

I am now 41 and he is 43. he is now in prison. hehad been there for 6 years and has 5 to go....we have started writting and all the feelings come back. horomones and butterflies start when I think about him....but my head is like what are you thinking?? But I still love him.....he was my first crush and his family loves me.....confused.

I'm inlove with a Inmate and let me tell u that the road is a long and lonely one, but as the day turns into nights and the Night turns into weeks and so forth and so forth. I find my self thinking is it all A DREAM WRAPPED IN A SILVER BOW? U KNOW LIKE THAT CLOUD WITH A SILVER LINING......WE'RE SCHEDULED TO BE MARRIED SOON I WOUNDER IF WE WILL MAKE IT PRAY FOR US........SENDING MY LOVE ALL THE WAY TO DANVILLE CORRECTIONAL FACILITY.......

My inmate is the best man I have ever been with--the only one who can handle me with my various severe flaws (which I am working on with him and by myself in therapy). I'm ride or die for him. He is in for life without parole. He is amazing in so many ways, one of them being that he doesn't expect me to be celibate for the rest of my life and in fact encourages me to find a special male friend to keep me company in ways that he cannot (I have no desire to do so, but I love that he is okay with it). We are intimate on the phone practically every single day and I never thought a sex life on the phone could be so satisfying. If he ever did get out of course he could be expected to want to taste a variety of female flavors, and I would be okay with that because he has shown me that I can be 100% secure in his love and I want him to be satisfied to the fullest, just as he wants the same for me.

I don't let myself think about how he will never get out and we will never get to be a "normal" couple. Our reality is that he is in prison for life, and that's the only way it is ever going to be so there's no point dwelling on wishes that will never come true. I'm extremely fortunate that he is in a place with cheap phone calls, of which I can afford to pay for plenty, and he can call all day except for count times. But even if he gets moved and I can only talk to him 20 minutes a week, I'm still with him for life. I love him so much and he is the only one who has ever proved himself trustworthy and truly loving me for my faults and all. This is my lot in the life of love, and I am okay with it. I feel like my life has meaning now, now that I am here for him when he has hardly anyone. I am so amazed by how lucky I am to have found him and that he is mine and I am his.

To those of you who have men/women who will be getting out eventually--have hope, hold on, and be grateful. I envy you guys. Know that one day you will look back on this time and be so glad that it is over and you now get to be with your other half completely.

Where do i start, i met this guy july 4,2010 i was 21 him 22, on july 7,2010, we chilled for the first time, we were inseparable, next thing u kno im living wit him, we were together 3 months then he got locked up n sentenced 3 years, we stopped talking, 3 years later i decide to reach out, one thing lead to another n hey we are a couple again, he got my name tatted while in there n he proposed to me, i never stopped loving this man, and he loves my son, i weng n visited him for the first time and we couldnt keep our lips off each other.. Hes beibg released in 2 1/2 months i cant wait because i love my inmate

ken has released last august 30, but we dont have communication at all.i just wish he could find a woman that would love him,

I am in a relationship with my boyfriend who happens to be an inmate. My days are filled with working to keep our home and nights are spent writing to him. We set ourselves short term goals. Once that goal is met we set another goal. We don't look at his time as 3 yrs but as 36 months. It just sounds shorter. We also have it down to the days he has left. We write each other love letters and try to think of his time away compared to someone being in the military. We have also pledged faithfullness. I could easily cheat on him and he could easily leave me once he gets out. So we both have trust between us. Together we will see this through and plan to marry once he is free to do so. Beach front wedding......

i miss ken so much, i hope he will find time to write me.

hi, i'm 15 and my boyfriend is 17 hes a bad boy, he's currently in jail and he was my first crush as well my first everything, and his family loves me too, since you've already been through this am i doing the right thing by staying with him i love him he only got a year

So so sorry to hear what happened to u. My heart dropped when u said another name on his list. How do u see the list? Mine is in state prison.

I met my boyfriend back when i was 16 he always was in and out of trouble but i always saw past all of that i knew what kind of man he was at heart. One worth fighting one. We dated for 2 years but my parents had had it with him and moved me away to break us up.while they were victorious with tearing us apart time went by (10 years) i had other boyfriends even had a wonderful little boy but something was always missing i was never REALLY happy. One January morning i was surprised to see a msg in my email from him! I immediately reached out to him and come to find out he was in prison again :( funny thing is he was down the street from me the whole time! I live within 5 minutes of the prison he is in..coincidental or fate?? Id like to think we were meant to be.all the feelings i had came back to me so quick ans realized i had to keep fighting for my happiness.weve been going strong since we first spoke in jan.he has 4 more years to go and tho it is hard to sit and wait i know we are worth it and god brought him back to me regardless of his situation.till i get my baby home ill be by his side..te quiero LOUIE

Wow! This is my story almost, my inmate was my first love 20 years ago. We were kids and certain issues split us up and we went seperate ways but I never ever forgot about him and have looked for him on and off for many years. Recently, I finally found him but to my dismay he is incarcerated. I wrote him and he wrote me back, all the feelings have rushed back for us both, we are falling in love all over again but its hard because he is behind those walls and we can't be together yet. I will never let go though, I found him and I'm not letting him go again. I'll wait forever if I have to.

Inspiring

I was in a relationship with a guy that was locked up & I saw the many signs that told me to stop. So in the end when it ended I had no one to blame but myself. But I'm now truly in love with a lifer & I see his love is truer than true. So speaking from experience find someone who will love & appreciate your love & dedication. No matter if they are in prison or not. There is someone who would love to love & apprciate you.

I pray that God continues to bless you and your family. Congratulations

my story is crazy when I say it out loud but we are in love so here it gos. i began speaking with my man about a year ago through his mother and found that he was brilliant, respectful and everything I could ever imagine in a man. then the question came about how much time he had left. in hesitation he said he had done 17 years already and had another 24 to go. Wow. That blew my mind. i couldn't wait to visit him one day but things took a little detour and I accepted a position in corrections as a nurse at a entirely different facility. i thought i could have my little short term experience and still go see him once my contract was up. my boss even said it was a non issue since its different facilities so we continued talking, writing and I fell head over heels for him. his family became apart of my life as well and we created something magical between the two of us. so once my temp hire contracted ended I decided to go see him for the first time and it was denied on grounds of an "innapropriate relationship" which I fought because their definition of it states that basically we met at work and started it there. so the next step they took since i fought it was to call it a prea issue and say it was harrassment then blocked all of our communication altogether. i was devastated and so was he. we both foughtfor it and finally got our communication back. God has truly taught me about faith, committment and patience through this whole experience. now we are on a mission to get visits approved. then from there we want to see about paroling early and have things reevaluated. we have talked about marriage but I havent made my mind up on wether i would marry him in prison or wait for his discharge date. i am positive everything will work out even if he doesnt get out any earlier.He is the love of my life and love prevails all. thankyou for reading. Any thoughts, prayers and support is much appreciated. Desiree

Congrats i pray it all works out for you. Email me any time missbaer31@yahoo.com

Very inspiring. if you would like to email and support each other my email addy is missbaer31@yahoo.com desiree